Found this Sunday

They say that whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger.
What they don't tell you is if it comes back, it doesn't hurt any less.

You don't grow an absolute immunity to it, there's no Power Word: Shield in this world and you certainly can't Bubble and Hearth out of it.

Sometimes it seems like you get those bite-sized portions of antigens to help cope. But sometimes it seems like your body doesn't have the capacity to procure antibodies for this one. The infection grows and you're plagued by the symptoms.

Pain is like a virus. You may catch one and maybe you will grow an immunity to it. But a new strain comes along. It's the old one but with a twist. Always the old one with a twist.

Of course there are the faces and the names of those you're lucky enough to have around you. They do their best but there are those times they don't understand and maybe you don't want them too.

They tell you its going to be all right, everything will turn out fine, you'll be okay.

But when? That's always the prompting question for this expository paper they can't write. When does that silver lining break the clouds, when do you reach the border to where you'd rather be?

The truth is, if it doesn't kill you, there was no other power helping you out of it. There was nothing to ease the pain and take it all away and return the equilibrium to your life.

The truth is, at the end of the day, the only person looking out for you is you.

No one told you which cloud to look at and no one paid for your passage across the border. It was you all along, your eyes and your price to pay.

You're the one who faced the bullshit with bullshit repellent and sprayed that motherfucker down.

And it screamed "Oh God it burns".